No One Prepared Me.

No one prepared me for what things would be like when I had a baby.

Before you decide not to read on because you've heard it all before, let me just warn you that this is different. 


I recently had my first baby. I am really into researching and reading as much as I can about pretty much everything. I'm constantly googling every question I have trying to learn what I can. In the months leading up to my baby's birth I read as much as I could about motherhood. I read about what my pregnancy should be like and what I could expect. I read about labor and birth and I went to classes at the hospital to prepare myself for giving birth to a human. I learned everything I possibly could and tried to get ready. When Quorra was born, I realized all the books and articles I'd read, everything I'd been told in my classes and by friends and family didn't really prepare me at all. My situation ended up completely different and unique from anyone else's. It turned out to be such an amazing experience for me. That day was unreal. It was beautiful and emotional and I wish I could go back and relive it. Pretty much all I'd been told in preparing to have my baby was how much it would hurt, how hard it would be to recover, and all the discomforts I would experience. 


No one told me how much love and support I would feel from my family and husband that day.
No one told me how natural and easy it would be for me. 
No one told me what it would be like to have my baby put onto my chest seconds after she was born. 
No one told me what it would be like to hear her cry for the first time, to look at her face for the first time after months of carrying her.
No one told me what it would be like to watch my husband hold our daughter for the first time and to watch him become a father.
No one told me what an amazing day it would be. I went in thinking I was completely prepared for what could and would happen that day and I was completely wrong. The scary experience I was expecting turned out to be the best day of my life. I can't describe the way I felt because it was unlike anything else I've ever experienced before. 

Fast forward three months and here I am with the most perfect little girl. Now that I've gotten into the groove of being a mom I am finding myself feeling that same way again: no one prepared me for this! 
No one told me how much joy and happiness was about to come into my life. 
No one told me that I would wake up to my baby laughing every morning. (Really though. She wakes up laughing. It is the most beautiful sound to wake up to.)
Everyone told me that my life was about to change - but not in the way I thought. My life has changed, but for the better. I was told that I'd never be able to sleep the same again after I had a baby - true, but I don't mind getting up to feed my girl. When I hold her in the middle of the night I feel lucky because she is still little and I can hold her and comfort her and someday I'll miss that. I know I will. I cherish every night because it's a moment I get to have with my baby. 

Everyone told me that my life would never be the same again, and they were right...But I wouldn't ever want my life to be the same again. I was given the most amazing gift. I love my baby girl more than anything in the world and I would do anything for her. Being a mom has made me happier than I have ever been in my entire life. I have never known happiness like the kind I feel now when I look at my daughter. I truly feel that this is what I was born to do. I have a purpose when I wake up, I have someone who counts on me every day. I can't even believe the way this has affected me, but it was not what I expected it to be. It is so much more. I look at my baby and I can't help but think that I KNOW her, that I have always known her. I can barely remember life before her. My fears are gone and I feel like I am owning being a mother. She is so special and I look at her and know that she will do amazing things. I love the innocence I see in her eyes. I love looking at her and holding her and knowing that just months before, she was with God. It is the most special thing and something you can't comprehend until you have a child.  I want anybody thinking about having a baby or expecting a baby to know how I feel. Yes, your life will change. Yes, you may have a little less time for yourself. But it is worth it. 

I had no idea what I was in for. 

And it is the best thing I can possibly imagine.

♥